Johnny Carson
sitemanagerPeople will pay more to be entertained than educated.
Johnny Carson
The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money.
Johnny Carson
Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die.
Johnny Carson
Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical…
Johnny Carson
If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
Johnny Carson
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
Johnny Carson
Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.
Johnny Carson
My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day.
Johnny Carson
The difference between divorce and legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money.
Johnny Carson
For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off.
Johnny Carson
If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.